DALLAS, TX — Millions are Texans are preparing for the upcoming months as Texas becomes the first state in the country to legalize open carry of anime fandom. In a state where residents have regularly carried shotguns, rifles, and even handguns openly in public, the movement towards opening displaying anime fandom has nevertheless drawn much resistance.
First Amendment advocates have pushed heavily for “open anime carry”, noting that weebs have the right to express themselves while President Obama and congressional Democrats have advocated against the policy because of sheer cringe-worthiness and public decency.
Texas Governor Greg Abbott signed the open anime carry legislation into law earlier this week, commenting that he looked forward to “finally showing the world how much I love Brave Witches.” It allows all residents to express their anime fandom by carrying or wearing any kind of anime paraphernalia. Private businesses that don’t want otaku scaring away their customers can post a notice outside their establishment banning open anime carry on their property.
Lawmakers have clarified that cosplay with weapons must be peacebonded, similar to policies at anime conventions, though they admitted that this policy seemed poorly thought out given the circumstances.
Law enforcement and have prepared for the potential deluge of emergency calls reporting people dressed and acting suspiciously.
“We need to educate people that individuals brazenly expressing anime fandom are not a threat, and instead of reacting with fear and confusion, one should cringe and silently judge them” Dallas Police Chief Herman Walker stated to the media. “Though I personally cannot wait to start patrolling the street wearing Kirito’s sick black swords.”
Walker noted that furries in Texas still run the risk of getting shot, because many people “just can’t tell them apart from real animals.”